Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize