I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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