Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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