so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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