btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
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