haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize