my mouth tastes like poor choices
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize