i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize