I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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