Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
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Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
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We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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