i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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