Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
