He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
don't judge my taste in strippers
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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