I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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