She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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