you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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