I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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