Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I fill condoms, not promises.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
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