O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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