singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
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Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
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My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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