Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
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