Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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