I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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