I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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