This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
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