I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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