I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize