Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
