just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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