is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
