yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
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