I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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