Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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