Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize
