I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
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I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
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At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos