my vag is so smooth its legendary
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You pole danced in your parka.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
