Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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