ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
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he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
and you fell through a lawn chair
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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