NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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