He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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