It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements