and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine