STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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