i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
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I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
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Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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