glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
