You're so nebulous sometimes
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind