sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.