well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.