escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing