on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize