I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class