Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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